Week 5: Goals (some of which are not lofty)

1. Convince ten tenth-graders that a novel that does not include (too much) mayhem and adventure (like Silas Marner) can be enjoyable and profitable to read.
2. Convince freshmen that studying for Vocabulary/Spelling quizzes is not optional.
3. Try out my new sonic flag-belts for flag football in P.E.
4. Remember to take snack bar orders in home room at least one day this week.
5. Wear a sweater-vest at least one time.
6. Get some coffee-creamer for the academy mini-fridge that isn't hazelnut.
7. Portray my enthusiasm for Elizabethan literature without appearing to eager: I plan on doing this by (a.) not letting my voice crack with excitement when I explain the "Marlowe assignment," and (b.) not creating a special Elizabethan high five.
8. Take a "writing break" in each of my English classes to encourage creative writing.
9. Initiate a campaign that promotes irony as "ah-ha" funny and not always "ha-ha" funny.
10. Write a compare and contrast paragraph about Dr. Pepper and Pibb Xtra.
11. Draw a really good picture of a koala bear holding a 12-gauge shotgun.
12. Avoid crying while grading English 9 literature tests.
13. Explain why Quixote is not pronounced with an x sound while quixotic is.
14. Avoid repeatedly banging my head on my desk when I find out how few of my freshmen actually read their book report books.
15. Perfect my Silas Marner impersonation.
16. Perform a one-minute pantomime of Booker T. Washington's autiobiography Up from Slavery.
17. Sing the praises of sock puppetry in a no-holds-barred lyrical ode.
18. Remind one specific junior that Wildfire was not a person. He was a horse.